Happy Birthday Chip!

Today is Chips birthday, so this post is dedicated to him, the love of my life. Happy Happy Birthday to you, my love, and many many more. You are my best friend, mentor, confidante, partner and so many more wonderful things. Life just keeps getting better and better everyday because of you and your wit, wisdom, love and support. I love the way you feel about the animals, about keeping promises, being loyal. I wish for you all the wonderful things you desire, and know that together we will make them all come true. You are truly the most wonderful man in the world! I love you!

We had a "surprise" party for Chip yesterday, in the guise of a family reunion committee meeting. Amy brought pizzas, and gave Chip a shot glass on a necklace and a drink cozy. Bonnie gave him the cutest card that sings. Al and Nancy came over and gave him a package of chamois cloths and some wax for his new tractor. So we had pizza and cake and sang Happy Birthday to him and he really did enjoy the day. Then the guys all went out to talk about the tractor, and us girls sat and talked. I was really glad to see Al and Nancy come over and spend some time. Then the kids came back and they had little Jessica on Ringer. We couldn't figure out what they were leading her with, and here, Hannah had found an old bridle in the tack room. They couldn't figure out how to get it on her so they just looped the reins around Ringers neck and led her up to the house. Good job girls, but you are very lucky that Jess didn't get hurt. So we got Shadow out and saddled him up and rode for a bit. I wanted to use Shadow since Karen is coming over today to ride and I want him to get used to it. After everyone left, we had the evening to ourselves. So it was a good day and he really enjoyed all the attention.

And today is a new day and Karen is coming over and we will cook out and have a great time, yes we will. Have to go and meet Karen now, but will be back later with an update on the day.
Hope you all have a wonderful day!

Annie

Welcome everyone! And welcome to the family my little Annie, dear. You all know that for a long time now I have been wanting a Golden Retriever puppy, and tonight my dream has come true. But let me start at the beginning...

Yesterday, Megan came into the office saying " Cindy, Look!" and she was holding a golden puppy. I nearly flew across the room to get to her. A customer had got her two days earlier and brought her in. She let me hold her, but I could tell that the puppy was not well. She was listless and her coat was dull and scabby. Then the lady decided to tell me she had lice. Yuck. And here I was holding her. But , just like with somebodys kid, you cant recoil in horror and thow it back at them, so I kept cuddling her and talking to her. They were really nice people and I know they will take good care of her and she will be fine, but I didn't want to get involved with a sick litter. Harry walked by and I told him I was looking for a golden and he said he would get the name of the people he bought his dog from. Well, later that night, Karen called me and emailed me and said that Harry called her and he had stopped and talked to the people and they had a brand new litter they were selling. So today I met Chip for lunch and told him about it and he said we could go tonight and look. So when I got back to work, I called and set an appointment and we went at 6:00 to see them.

First, I have had the name Annie for a few months now. It just came to me out of the blue and I knew that that was the right name. When we got there, Chip noticed the first cage in the room and it had the name "Annie" on it! How wierd is that. In fact while I am writing this, I am overcome with the feeling that this is absolutely RIGHT.So it turns out that the pups mommy is named Annie. Hmmmmm.

Well, the lady pulled out three females, two light and one dark. I really like the in-between, not too light and not too dark, but the darker one was really the prettiest. Right away I decided against one of the lighter ones-she just didn't have any personality. But the other light one kind of spoke to me. Chip was holding the dark one and I could tell he really liked her. Then we switched and once I held the dark one I felt it too. But I still liked the light one and thought I saw a little of Brandy in her. I was just so confused! Then we put the pups back in their box and let mom in to feed them and after that I watched them some more and the light one was so timy next to the others and I started leaning for the darker one. Really, I was hoping that she would jump right out at me and pretty much say "it's me! take me home", but she didn't . And after all, she is just 25 days old. So even though I didn't have that BAM! revelation, I did know that I wanted that puppy. On the way home I told that to Chip and he said, "well. maybe Brandy was waiting to see which one you picked so she could become that one". So that clinches it.

Bran... I do hope that that is what you are doing. I miss you so much. You know that no one will ever replace you in my heart. You were my once in a lifetime dog. I will love you always, my dearest friend.I know by the signs that you have given me over the last few months that you are ok with this, and that I am doing the right thing.Forever, my friend.

Ok, ok. This is really a happy moment. I feel great emotions right now, but not necessarily guilt, like I thought I would. Its really exciting. And the signs, come on people! It couldn't be any clearer if it hit me over the head. This is right.

Also, tomorrow most of the Lukens are coming over for a family reunion planning committee meeting. Somehow our house got volunteered to host. So I have to go now and clean for the people. Also it is going to be a surprise party for Chip, his birthday is Sunday. So that should be fun, and I think he will be surprised. And Sunday Karen is coming over, and that is going to be really fun. We are going to ride Shadow and maybe I will saddle up Rusty as well. We will see how he behaves. So it is already 9:00 and I have a lot of cleaning to do, but, also feel like I have cleansed my soul on these pages tonight. Oh, it feels so good! What do you all think?

To all of you, my friends, best wishes and lots of love.

Cindy

Serendipity

Ahhhh. The title says it all. This has been quite a wonderful week for me in many ways. The weather is beautiful, work has been fun and non stressful, and Chip has been super romantic. Wednesday morning we had a discussion about the puppy and he said I should start looking for a good breeder and asked what I was looking for exactly and what my expectations were. I was floored! So on to work I went to share the good news with the girls. That evening when I got home, he had bought me a bouquet of flowers ( purple and pink ) and a card! Wow. We didn't discuss puppies any more until last night. We decided to go to Larosa's ( we hardly EVER go out to eat) and get some Italian. We had a coupon for a free dessert because of Chips birthday, and had to eat in to redeem it. Then the waitress gave me the wrong pizza by mistake and so we got an extra pizza for free. The dessert was fabulous! Chocolate fudge brownies with Graeter's Raspberry chip ice cream. Three words.. OH MY GOD! So when I paid, I handed her my Discover card with the golden retrievers on it, by mistake because they don't accept Discover. She commented on how cute the card was and that she loves Goldens and has them herself. So of course we asked if she knew any good breeders and as it happens, she is friends with someone nearby who breeds. She gave us her phone number and said to call her and she will get me the information. Plus, her story was that she got her first golden as a college student, and that is how Brandy came to us, a young girl had her and couldn't keep her in her dorm room. The similiarities were boggling. A sign, do you think??

I do feel excited about this, but little scared too. Will we find the right one? Will she find us? Brandy will show us the way.

It is one of those days where I feel extremely greatful for all the gifts in my life. A wonderful loving husband, great animal companions, great friends both in person and on the web, a fantastic lifestyle that I love and respect. So often we look at others and are envious of their lives and the things they possess. Happily, I am content. There is no where else that I'd rather be. Ok, maybe on a movie set with Ron Perlman, at a beach, but other than that :)

The outdoors is calling me to come out and play, and I must heed the call. A good brisk walk around the place will be a perfect close for the day, don't you think? To all of you out there, blessings and love and happiness.

Bovine Communication

Clara was napping in the shade beneath the big oak trees in the woods when I walked up on her and the rest of the herd. She looked up sleepily and rose to her feet when she realized I was amongst them. Then she did the most amazing thing, proving that cows are not as dumb as you may think. She jumped up and pointed herself in the direction of the house, mooed, and started walking away from me. Nothing odd there, right? Usually a cow will try to psych you out and lead you away from her hidden calf by looking in the opposite direction of where she has put it. But this cow started walking and lowing and led me right to her calf. Then she stopped and looked at me as if to say " well, there she is, now do something". So I ran to the house and got the bottle and milk and a halter and ran back to feed the calf, knowing that Clara does not have very much milk herself to offer. When I returned, Clara walked over to me and smelled the bottle. She is not the friendliest of cows, and usually will go out of her way to avoid you, so this was also very interesting to me. But then the calf got startled and started to bolt off, so Clara chased after her and I went on down to the barn to get some sweet feed for Clara. By the time I got back, Clara had rejoined the herd and even though I tried to treat her with the feed, she was not able to eat it because the other cows started milling around wanting the food. So I will have to try again later to get the calf some milk. She seems to be doing quite nicely herself though, so hopefully she is getting enough.

Ron Perlman : Big week there. Got Beauty and the Beast season 2. and Acts of Contrition. And got to watch Acts..., and Hellboy Blood and Iron last night. Yay, a Ron-a-Thon! Golly, I love that man. Pat emailed me this week to let me know that Ron is not in Crime and Punishment, so I don't have to worry about getting that dvd. I was really flattered that she mailed me to let me know. She even watched it again to be certain. Will I get to meet you Ron? And what then?We all know that my fantasy is to work with him. Will that ever happen? Right now I am just enjoying the journey.

Going to go now and cut the grass. I need to get my chores done so I can relax later and read. I am feeling a bit philosophical lately and am reading this book called Happier by Tal- Ben Shahar. It is very technical, not an easy read, but interesting none the less. And it had lots of exercises to do so you can find your own happiness. So you all have a great day!

A Lucky Day

Today is Friday the 13th, typically considered a day of bad luck, however, I have always had reasonably good luck on the day. Today was no exception. First, work went very well. I got all caught up and loose ends all tied up. Very satisfying to start the weekend with a clean slate.

Decided to forgo blogging and take a walk this evening instead. You see, the weather is beautiful and I feel free since I got so much done today. There is nothing dismal hanging over my head and I decided to celebrate the wonderful feeling. Walked a little, picked some blackberries, chased a few rabbits, looked for the cows. Clara, the oldest cow was missing and I was a little afraid of what I might find, but I found her, and her new baby! Clara doesn't have a lot of milk, so we are going to feed her some special stuff and give the baby a bottle tomorrow. Gotta treat the old lady well. Then when I walked back down to the creek, I found the skeleton of a young buck. Must have died in the creek. Sad, but quite interesting.

You know how early on in my blog I was skeptical of friends because I had been betrayed and hurt recently? Well, I am really opening my heart and trusting again. We have my long distance friendship with Raka, who always comes through for me, and brightens my day whenever she contacts me. She is young and beautiful and adventurous and fun, and smart and I love hearing about her life. And we have Karen, who is so much like me. We have been teasing the last couple of days that we will be together as little old ladies and I will be her eyes and she will be my ears ( she can't see so well and I can't hear so well) and we will toddle along together with our really old dogs by our sides. Well, it has never felt so right to me, to have such a friend. It is like we are soul mates and have finally hooked up after 40 years. I have not dared to care about someone, to give my heart to someone , in such a long time for fear of betrayal, yet I am compelled to do so with Karen. I am not talking about it in a romantic way, of course, but in a deep loving friend kind of way. It is hard to take a chance and care about someone again, but I have faith in her and hope that she feels the same. That is what is so hard about letting your guard down with someone, is they have the power to hurt you, and you have to trust that they won't. Sometimes it is important enough to give it a try.

After all, I am being adventurous. It was really neat picking through the deer remains and piecing together the skeleton. I put the skull and jawbones on the windowsill of the barn to show Chip tomorrow. And maybe I will go for a quick ride on Shadow or Rusty tomorrow. But first I really should wash the Mustang. And mow the lawn.

Chips new tractor came home last night. It sure is purty! Tomorrow he is gonna drive it some. So that is his birthday present this year. I took a couple of pictures of it so maybe I will post one on the blog tomorrow.

Its getting pretty late and I need to get a shower. I want Karen and Raka and all my blogger friends to know how much you all mean to me, and peace and love to you all!

What a glorious day it is today. Aside from the fact that it's getting a bit hot out, and quickly at that, the weather is beautiful. Chip had to work at Camco today and I decided to come along for the ride. I love going along with him on Saturday's when he has to work because we get to have a nice little ride together. Sure, I have to sit in the truck most of the day, but it i a great time to think and reflect. I could have gone in to work today, but this is so much better and I think Chip enjoys having me along. And if I stayed at home, I would just read or watch tv and clean, so this way I can just chill and relax with no distractions. That's what weekends are supposed to be for any way, right?

Driving out through Kentucky, I realize that the country we live in is not so much country after all. Sure, we have a farm in a semi-rural area, but the city is so close by - there are way too many people. How great would it be to have thousands of acres and live in a small, close knit community?

The little voice in my head has quieted its calling a bit now that I am working again, but it's still there, whispering to me from time to time to "make a difference". I guess now I am just so busy that I barely have the time to listen to it.

It takes time though. I feel a much deeper calm, more centered and grounded than I did this time last year. And I have made quite a few accomplishments, too. It is really great to learn new things and conquer old fears. This time last year I was not a Master in Microsoft, was not a Notary, was not a title clerk, had not lost 10 pounds, learned to drive a stick, had not met some very special people who now are so important to me - Raka and Karen. All of these accomplishments involved some degree of hard work and courage. And what does the future hold for me?? I know that I am learning to juggle, want to ride a mechanical bull, walk on fire. I would like to really start riding again, maybe get a really nice little horse that Syd and Karen could ride so we could ride together, maybe get Chip to ride with us too. Well, we will see. All I know is that things are so much better today than this time last year. Thank you, Lord. I hope that our lives just continue to get better and better and more loving and joyous all the time. There is still a lot more to learn, lots of new adventures to have, and I hope that it is that way for all of you, too.

Blessings to all!

The Key, The Buzzards, and The Hidden Treasure

Hi everybody, I'm baaackkk. This weekend and week have been tremendously busy and this is the first chance I have gotten to sit down and blog.

Saturday was very exciting. John came over and Claire came along. He towed out the small trailer, and we brought along the big trailer and we went to Sunman to pick up the farm equipment and the hay. It was a stunningly beautiful day and we got so much done!! Claire was put in charge of lunch and she decided on Dairy Queen, which she had never had before. We took our first trip, loaded the cutter and a load of hay ( we got 10 bales on the load !!) and came back home. Then we got lunch, Claire and I went to pick up burgers, but we decided to do the ice cream later. After our pic-i-nic we were off again. This time, the guys were doing all the work and Claire and I decided to go exploring. We went up to the old house and waded our way through the weeds ( and poison ivy) and found a way in. The windows were all broken out but we made plans to come back and fix the place up and make a clubhouse out of it. A white furry rug and purple paint anybody?? Cool!! Clair was looking at the stuff on the floor and found a key, a very old one that was all rusted and we started to imagine what the key opened. Then we went over to the big barn and I said it smelled like something dead in there. We opened the door and a white fuzzy thing went scuttling by. At first I thought it was a possum, but when we got inside we saw that it was huge baby buzzards! And I mean huge. Big as turkeys. They were making this wierd hissing sound but they were terrified and huddled in the corner, so we took some pictures and then left and got John to come see. So here's what we think..... The key opens a hidden treasure chest, and it is probably being protected by the buzzards. Or the next clue in where to find the treasure ( a map perhaps) , is what they are protecting, and we have to find a way to distract them and find the clues and the map and the hidden treasure. Oh boy! What will be in the chest when we find it?? What do you think??

Anyway, it was great fun. And after John and Claire went home, Chip and I made another trip. So it was quite late by the time we got back and we were exhausted. Then Sunday we did the same thing, bringing home the rest of the hay and Bella. Yay, Bella is back home. That is the mose gruelling part of the whole trip, taking her on the trailer. She is quite large and the phone lines seem quite low when you are going under them :) It really is so nice to have everything back home again. So that was the weekend and it was busy!

Then Monday was month end and you would have been so proud of me! 21 deals came in that day, and more after that. But I did not freak. I just took one at a time and got them done. Then I did the inventories and the other month end stuff. Then Wednesday was the 4th of July so we had the day off and got the grass cut and the yard looking great. So Yesterday I got to finish June stuff and today I started on July. I got pretty much done, but I have to go to jury duty next week so I am not sure how much work I will get done then. But no sweat. I am only human and can only do what I can do. I worked 14 hour days all week, and that is pretty dedicated if you ask me. So I think I am learning to chill out and not drive myself to the point of insanity. This is a really good thing and I need to remember it, because I have been calmer and more centered this week than since I started working there. The whole point is to enjoy myself, not drive myself crazy. Remember this.

Also, Karen had a bad week this week. It seemed like everyone was picking on her, and there was nothing I could do about it. Kathy yelled at her for nothing, Jemar blamed her for doing something wrong that was really his fault, she WAS doing it right, and he was wrong. Pete went off a couple of times about a deal that had nothing to do with her, it was my deal and the guys had taken it back and forgotten about it amidst month end stuff. But they kept yelling that she had lost some paperwork and no one would listen to us telling them that it was that deal they had taken. So I felt real bad for her this week, cause she sure works harder than anybody there and doesn't deserve that. She needs to be treated with respect and kindness and appreciation. But I don't think anyone shows appreciation anymore. Well I appreciate you, Karen. And so does Harry. Harry is such a great person. He bought us lunch today and wouldn't let us pay him back. I know he gets pleasure from taking care of people, but he needs to know how much people love and appreciate him, too.Well, we will think of something.

So I have been rambling again. Its getting late and I think I will go out and see what Chip is up to. Everyone have a great weekend, and take care of each other.

Love